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going bridal (again)

Jun 1, 2007
4 comments

I'm not sure that I believe in marriage.

Or rather, its current state as an institution. I do have some qualms about it.

On June 24 of this year, studpoet and I will have been together for seven years. Lucky number seven. You may or may not know that we have been planning a wedding, off-and-on for the last year or so. It was supposed to take place September 24, 2007, but if you haven't received an invitation in the mail, don't panic. It's not happening...on that day.

It's still happening, but I don't have any further details for you at this time.

Recently I have found myself turning into Bridezilla. Especially after talking to a friend, and he told me his wedding cost 10-15K.

Umm, no. That's a car, homeskillet. Downpayment on a house.

Then I had another conversation (this time, with my ex-boyfriend) and he was expressing some concerns about his upcoming nuptials. Him: "Getting married is kinda like dipping your head in a tub in your bathroom and saying you're baptized." LOL

Anyway, back to me. I don't know. Maybe it's not marriage, but instead weddings (of the traditional variety) that I don't believe in. I don't need or want to feel like a princess, I don't need or want to have 100+ people there, I don't need or want to have a white gown with lace and a flowing train, I don't need or want to have an officiant bless my union.

But I realized that I had that script in my head. I felt like I should want those things, because that's what you do for a wedding, right? And not having those things means you didn't get the Wedding Memo, and you look like an ass to other people, right?

Anyway, that's what I thought. Even though that's not what I really want. Honestly, I feel like I'm already married, for all intensive purposes. What I really want is just to celebrate my relationship and the love I have with/for Stephanie with friends and loved ones, in a classy yet quirky (not to mention, affordable) manner.

So after some talking and a squabble and a pout or two, I've decided that hey, we're gay, it's already a little out the box. Bump it, we're gonna do this our way. F*** The Wedding Memo.